5 Steps To Being Liked By All Those Stupid, Crappy Jerks Who Think They’re Better Than You

It can seem so hard, sometimes, to get people to like you.  But with a few simple tricks, you can get anyone to like you, because people are such easily manipulated idiots! (Note: don’t tell them they’re idiots who are easily-manipulated.  Maybe that should be #6…)

1. People like to hear their name said to them


2. Ask people questions


3. Ask someone to help you with something


4. Make eye-contact. Notice things about people


5. Repeat what people say back to them

Slide5And just like that, you’ll be the hit of the party and/or workplace!


About The Byronic Man

Recently voted "The Best Humor Site in America That I, Personally, Write," The Byronic Man is sometimes fiction, but sometimes autobiography. And sometimes cultural criticism. Oh, and occasionally reviews. Okay, it's all those different things, but always humorous. Except on the occasions that it's not. Ah, geez. Look, it's a lot of things, okay? You might like it, is the point.

View all posts by The Byronic Man


Subscribe to our RSS feed and social profiles to receive updates.

41 Comments on “5 Steps To Being Liked By All Those Stupid, Crappy Jerks Who Think They’re Better Than You”

  1. Hippie Cahier Says:

    Oh, Byronic! It is so good to see you. How have you been, Byronic? If I write a ridiculous question, or if I compliment your jib, do you suppose my comment will be directed to spam? If so, would you mind taking it out?

    You probably knew someone like me would come along and write a comment using your five steps, didn’t you? You are so clever and I am an easily manipulated idiot.

    But in a good way. 🙂


  2. The Beginners Says:

    Hahaha… sounds like you know almost as much about crime as we do! Nice one… htttp://thebeginners.net


  3. Go Jules Go Says:

    Giveaways. #6 is definitely giveaways.


  4. List of X Says:

    I’d say “getting tazed” is #7. It’s a great conversation topic that lets those crappy jerks to still feel superior to you?


  5. Roy Sexton (Reel Roy Reviews) Says:

    Oh my goodness! You had me with your title, and then I read your advice juxtaposed with those line drawings. Way to start a Monday morning! Thank you



  6. themayfairy Says:

    I know people who do step number one – a lot -. I hate these people. 😉


  7. mistyslaws Says:

    I just buy my friends. Who says money can’t buy happiness? It costs extra to gaze into their eyes and ask questions, though.


  8. BrainRants Says:

    Kurosawa. Don’t taze me, Bro.


  9. Blogdramedy Says:

    Or at the bottom of a construction site.
    Encased in concrete.


  10. The Philosophunculist Says:

    I often find myself repeating back to people, making eye contact, asking questions, and using their name, all at the same time: “Why don’t YOU put YOUR pants back on, Daaaaan?!” or “How about YOU get the hell out of this party, STEEEEVE?!”
    They still never seem to like me though.


  11. rachelocal Says:

    Is that a Ninja Turtle holding up Brian?


  12. becomingcliche Says:

    Number 5 is the best. I have been using it all day. I’m making so many friends. I know it’s coincidence that everyone left at lunch time without telling me. And locked me in the supply closet. Those kidders!


  13. Jackie Cangro Says:

    At my office, we call # 5 the “reverse the pressure” technique.


  14. The Cutter Says:

    Some people are really big on hearing their name. I was once bitched out by a woman because I just said “hello”, and not “Hello, “


  15. Sandy Sue Says:

    I’m opting for the Serial Killer Eye Contact. Nothing says “I’m likable” like a Hannibal Lector gaze (or is that taze?).


  16. susielindau Says:

    Ha!!! I will have to be more observant and mention pore size next time… Thanks for the great advice!


  17. jbw0123 Says:

    Thank you. Taking notes. Will file under rebrianizing. Wait. Does this work just on stupid crazy jerks?

    P.S. Honestly, tell us. Who does your hair?


  18. silkpurseproductions Says:

    An English teacher once asked me to stop looking him the eye. It was freaking him out and he couldn’t take it any more. I was an evil child.


  19. Elyse Says:

    Good to see you B-man. Everybody else stole all my witty lines, the beasts.


  20. TheCrazyBagLady Says:

    Thanx Byronic Man! I don’t really care if people dont like me. I can’t please everyone 🙂


  21. lizziearias Says:

    Your illustrations cracked me up, loved the post.


Every Time You Leave A Comment, An Angel Gets Its Wings.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: