Caption Contest: Bad Dream Senior Pictures Edition

January 13, 2013


It’s caption contest day!  Hurray! You all know how this works: ponder the odd majesty of the image below and leave your best caption; next week I’ll present the finalists for voting.

Some images are just weird.  Some you can tell were caught at just the wrong moment.  Then there are the ones that you really, really wish you knew the story behind – this… this is probably the opposite of that.

I will start things rolling: “What?  My ad said ‘Nude Photography.’  I am a photographer.  I am nude.  Stop acting so confused.”


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About The Byronic Man

Recently voted "The Best Humor Site in America That I, Personally, Write," The Byronic Man is sometimes fiction, but sometimes autobiography. And sometimes cultural criticism. Oh, and occasionally reviews. Okay, it's all those different things, but always humorous. Except on the occasions that it's not. Ah, geez. Look, it's a lot of things, okay? You might like it, is the point.

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85 Comments on “Caption Contest: Bad Dream Senior Pictures Edition”

  1. josefkul Says:

    Here at Bare Ass Photography we bring entirely new meaning to the words ‘flash photography’!


  2. Rutabaga the Mercenary Researcher Says:

    Um… I’m trying to eat my breakfast 🙂


  3. W Says:

    When Alfred told Charlotte that he was a point and shoot photographer, she just prayed he meant his camera.


  4. on thehomefrontandbeyond Says:

    I threw up a little in my mouth


  5. Hippie Cahier Says:

    Weekly Photo Challenge: Wrong. So Very-Nightmarishly-Indescribably-Wrong-That-There-Are-No-Adverbs-To-Capture-It-Wrong.

    I vote for your caption, though.


  6. hiddinsight Says:

    “Now for this shot I want you to picture me naked…”


  7. Maria Says:

    Wow! I can’t stop looking. I leave the site, I walk away and yet I return, repeatedly. *laugh*


  8. TAE Says:

    This picture leaves my mind utterly blank…and I wonder if that’s maybe a good thing.


  9. Every Record Tells A Story Says:

    People often wondered why there were very few photos of Ansell Adams…


  10. Every Record Tells A Story Says:

    “Jack, when I said I wanted you to increase the exposure, this wasn’t exactly what I had in mind…”


  11. angeliquejamail Says:

    “Fine, fine, you’re right. Your poses are much more interesting. Geez. Last time I play strip photography with you!”


  12. karensamenow Says:

    “It’s a known fact, my camera takes better pictures when I’m unencumbered M’Lady!”


  13. Angie Z. Says:

    In a new approach to her research, best known for inspiring the movie “Gorillas in the Mist,” scientist Dian Fossey trades places with her subject for the day.


  14. mistyslaws Says:

    Adopting the wisdom of toddlers by closing her eyes to assume invisibility, Sally just kept chanting, “be the tree, BE THE TREE.”


  15. TAE Says:

    Ok, so this took me a long while. Therefore it’s especially thoughtful:

    “Yeah, yeah! Hug it! Tighter! I said, HUG IT!”


  16. List of X Says:

    “Yes, yes, finally, there’s that sad and disgusted look I was asking for!!!”


  17. Life With The Top Down Says:

    Hugo finally reveals the flash method used to land Monica the cover of Shock & Awe Magazine.


  18. List of X Says:

    A chance to capture a photo of a rare North American tree-hugger can come when you are least prepared to take it…


  19. Elyse Says:

    Some folks just need jewels in their navels to liven things up.


  20. Richard L Wiseman Says:

    Welcome To Cornwall!


  21. Kim Says:

    “OK… right there! Perfect! Stare forlornly, deep into my belly button. Great!”


  22. YeahWhatSheSaid Says:

    “Hey, hey! Camera’s up here, sweetheart.”


  23. k8edid Says:

    I have as much chance making it as a professional photographer as you do graduating in May, sweetheart…


    When Mom said I could get a class ring if I got the stripped-down senior picture package – she wasn’t kidding…


  24. NiinaMaria Says:

    I was told that the photographer was outstanding but that’s little bit too much out and standing.


  25. Tez Says:

    “Is that a camera on your face, or are you just pleased to see me?’


  26. The Bumble Files Says:

    Yours is hard to top!

    Mine is: I can’t look at you. Will you just put that thing way?


  27. Barbara Backer-Gray Says:

    Oh Sexy Stalin, please come rescue me!


  28. musingsoftheamusingmuse Says:

    Wow. I am at a loss for words on this one! However, I shared it with the modeling education group I moderate… they’ll appreciate it!


  29. L @ Trying Not to be Fat Says:

    It seriously hurts to look at that. I don’t think I’m hungry anymore!


  30. renée a. schuls-jacobson Says:

    When Peter whipped out his long black camera lens, The Giving Tree decided she had given quite enough.


  31. Jill Pinnella Corso Says:

    “Take five. I left my telephoto lens in my other shorts.”


  32. Go Jules Go Says:

    When Sally said she liked wood, Hal knew he’d finally found the perfect subject.


  33. MJ Says:

    maybe if i hide behind this tree he won’t see me!


  34. winopants Says:

    In order to blend with the natural surroundings, Demitri decided to eschew traditional lighting, relying instead on his ethereally white skin to illuminate his subject


  35. thesinglecell Says:

    In order to calm her nerves about being a newly-discovered supermodel, Melanie decided to picture her photographer clothed.


  36. thesinglecell Says:

    Submission #2:
    Melanie quickly discovered the danger of walking alone in the Grecian woods. The natives were nothing like she’d imagined.


  37. thesinglecell Says:

    Submission #3:
    “Who wears sandals in the woods?” Melanie wondered.


  38. thesinglecell Says:

    Submission #4:
    Melanie fretfully pondered what kind of lens Lars had stashed in his shorts.


  39. thesinglecell Says:

    Submission #5:
    While the camera focused on her face, she tried not to notice that his chest was furry, but his underarms were strangely smooth.


  40. stettlerpro Says:

    Let’s hurry this up, my baby is kicking.


  41. freshveggies/gingerleaphoto Says:

    Fruit of the Loom Photography, “The Woodsman”


  42. k8edid Says:

    The elusive double-breasted bed-thrasher is filmed for a documentary to appear on Sasquatch-TV.


  43. UndercoverL Says:

    ‘Just stare into my eye… let your eyes tell the story.’


  44. twindaddy Says:

    “I think the lens is longer. Why am I letting this idiot take my picture?”


  45. Brown Road Chronicles Says:

    It didn’t take long for California based “Girls Gone Wild” Photographer Joe Scarbone to realize that his latest project “Girls in the Wild” shot deep in the Oregon woods, would not have nearly the commercial success as his previous project.


  46. rossmurray1 Says:

    After much consideration, Marguerite felt the camera feature was the sole redeeming quality of the new Apple iVlad.


  47. Sandy Sue Says:

    Goodness, these captions are all stellar. How will we ever vote?


  48. Michael Says:

    Mary-Jane didn’t care if her boyfriend was Spider-Man; Peter Parker’s photography career had taken a turn for the creepy.


  49. Eireen Says:

    “Please take off those shoes immediately Rob! They make you look disgusting!”


  50. Lorna's Voice Says:

    Mine is: “Nothing comes between me and my Calvins… well, maybe this tree and and a can of pepper spray.”


  51. 1pointperspective Says:

    Otto was just about to snap a shot of the tree when another beautiful young woman came running into the frame. That Speedo is a magnet for the chicks, man.


  52. 1pointperspective Says:

    Ernst wanted to be ready in case he had to raise his arm during the photo shoot, so he had his pits waxed. Sadly, he had under estimated the importance of maintaining the rest of the package.


  53. 1pointperspective Says:

    Angus invested some of his earnings from the Southern Comfort commercials in a nice 35mm camera.


  54. aaforringer Says:

    If I tell him the camera lense is on this will take even longer.


  55. thevelvetpillow Says:

    ” I will display my imperfections, while you hide your insecurities. Come out and let the real you shine lady.”


  56. RC Says:

    Im relatively confident that guy has had a Brazilian wax recently. He pays great attention to his lines…



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