I went to the movies last night and when I exited – this is about 11:00 pm – the lobby of the theater was filled with people. People lining up, people getting snacks, people milling. The parking lot was a flurry of activity. And why? I finally backtracked and looked at the head of the […]
Author Archives | The Byronic Man
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Recently voted "The Best Humor Site in America That I, Personally, Write," The Byronic Man is sometimes fiction, but sometimes autobiography. And sometimes cultural criticism. Oh, and occasionally reviews. Okay, it's all those different things, but always humorous. Except on the occasions that it's not. Ah, geez. Look, it's a lot of things, okay? You might like it, is the point.And Yes, I Do Carry Tranq Darts Around, Just In Case of Socially Awkward Situations.
June 27, 2011
So, put yourself in this position and ask yourself what the appropriate response would be: A friend of mine was telling me about a few years back when she and her (then) husband were at Disneyland. They’re in line for whatever. The husband sees an man of Asian ethnicity a few places ahead of them […]
I Wrote The Most Interesting Blog Post… And You Were In It!
June 25, 2011
So, I had this dream last night– no, wait! Come back! I’m not going to go into detail about my dream, I promise. If you read my last post (and if not, why not? ) you recall it had to do with the guy here who posted a Craigslist ad for a time-travelling companion to […]
I Think You’ll Find We Go Together Like… Well, Like Time-Travel and Fishing
June 20, 2011
This is a real posting on Craigslist from this weekend, here where I live. I’ve kept it exactly as is, except for removing information which might reveal identity or contact information: In need of a time travel companion (please take this seriously) Date: 2011-06-17, 5:38PM PDT I have a functioning time machine I know it […]
Come on, Canada. You can talk to us. Just Tell Us What You’re Feeling.
June 18, 2011
Hi, Canada, come on in. Yes, I know, I’m not dressed for the water park… we’re… we’re not going to the water park. Have a seat. No, no, don’t leave, no one’s judging anyone here. You can’t really believe that we’re in a position to judge anyone’s behavior. I just… I’m, that is we’re worried […]
How Ian Holm Saved Me From Alzheimer’s
June 15, 2011
Last night there was a major breakthrough in the battle against Alzheimers. What? No, there isn’t some new medicine, or the announcement that we all now need to eat six pounds of asparagus a day, or anything like that. Come on. No, no, what happened was, I was able to remember the name of the […]
You Work With Atoms, You Put Your Life On The Line. Every Day.
June 11, 2011
News Item – The BBC reported that nuclear physicists in the search for antimatter have had a major breakthrough. Scientists at the Switzerland/France CERN particle collider announced the successful capture of an anti-hydrogen atom for almost 16 minutes. Dr. Skeinman: Well, we’ve come close a few times before. Once we thought we’d captured one, but it […]
When it Comes To Apocalypse Predictions, Third Time’s The Charm
May 26, 2011
Well, well, well. You’re feeling pret-ty smug, aren’t you? I’ll be honest – so was I. “Rapture,” I said. “Feh. Wrong again! What a kook!” I was actually looking forward to hearing how Harold Camping, the religious bookmaker who predicted the end this last Saturday, would explain the failure to rapt. I had pretty even […]
The Byronic Man 
June 29, 2011
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