All I ask are moments of peace where I can stop and be in the moment. All I ask is to be grateful for the things I have. All I ask is to be trusted and worthy of trust. All I ask is to have the courage to try new things, and to be immediately […]
Author Archives | The Byronic Man
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Recently voted "The Best Humor Site in America That I, Personally, Write," The Byronic Man is sometimes fiction, but sometimes autobiography. And sometimes cultural criticism. Oh, and occasionally reviews. Okay, it's all those different things, but always humorous. Except on the occasions that it's not. Ah, geez. Look, it's a lot of things, okay? You might like it, is the point.“And Next Up Is… Well, Not Me, Apparently…”
September 23, 2013
This weekend I emceed a fund-raiser for an actor here who was in an accident and, being an actor, has no insurance. My initial plan for today’s post was to simply post the video of my opening “warm up the crowd” routine. This proved problematic when there was no crowd except the benefit organizers and […]
The Horrid Stench Of Responsibility
September 19, 2013
Recently a drainage pipe under the house broke. It took far longer to realize what was going on than is even remotely reasonable. It was when the fly population exploded that we finally realized something had to be done. My wife, of course, was there to look out for the (very) little guy. When we […]
“Awkward Family Photos” I Love Unironically
September 16, 2013
They’e everywhere, and they’re almost too painful to look at. The awkward family photos. But sometimes I can’t help but think, you know… good on ya. Good. On. Ya. 1. Okay, they’re not in great shape… at all… but look at their faces. They are in to it. And you totally get the archetype […]
Please Hire Me To Solve The Syrian Crisis
September 12, 2013
Look, there’s no question about it. This situation in Syria is complicated and disturbing, top to bottom, start to finish. And anyone who says they know exactly what to do either doesn’t have all the information, or is lying. Which is why you need me. Because I know exactly what to do. But don’t just […]
Sing First, Ask Questions Later
September 9, 2013
There are two kinds of people when it comes to singing songs you only kind of know the words to. Those who stop, and those who persevere. Below are the lyrics to the old Irish song, “Whiskey In The Jar,” as sung by me yesterday, in proper, Irish stubborn refusal to give up. Here’s the […]
Ultimate Survival Guide: When Bad Ears Happen To Good Bees
September 3, 2013
“Get to a dark place as quickly as possible and try to lure the bee out of your ear with a single source of light like a flashlight… Never try to pull it out with your fingers.” – From “Tormented By A Bee In Your Ear,” Dangerous Situations, And How To Escape in One Piece, […]
25 Of The Onion’s Best Headlines, For Their 25th Anniversary
August 30, 2013
Look, I like to think I can make with the occasional bit of funny here. But I know who’s in charge. And that Monarch is, of course, The Onion. Sorry, Brits – The Daily Mash is pretty great, but The Onion is, frankly, staggering. And today they are 25 years old. So, to celebrate in […]
The Byronic Man 
September 26, 2013
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