Who is Joel K Clements?
He is accepted by bears the world over as one of them
Every time he plugs in a USB cable, it’s turned the right way
Joel K Clements’ mind is so powerful that when he thinks sad thoughts, flowers die
Every time Joel K Clements makes a phone call, he is the ninth caller and wins concert tickets
Once a year, he goes to Pamplona to chase the bulls
He wrote the novel Heart of Darkness under the pen name ‘Joseph Conrad’ and the pen year ‘1899’
When dolphins go on vacation they like to swim with Joel K Clements
He… what? No? Not buying it? Oh…
Fine.
Joel K Clements is an award-winning writer and performer; an Oregon native who began writing in 1992. He has contributed short fiction to publications like Funny Times and Primal Word, and his most recent short film, “Split Time,” was featured in several festivals in the US and Europe. The Times once tweeted that he was a humor writer of note. That was cool.
His varied background of jobs – including bartender, farmhand, submarine tour guide, bouncer, and touring stand-up comedian (during which he won the Oregon Comedy Competition) – has shaped a lot of his writing as well as his draw toward the ways we are pushed to define our lives by external forces.
One would also not be out of order to accuse Joel of being a little fixated on the nature of time.
For work, he teaches writing and film studies, as well as conducting seminars for teachers on innovative methods of teaching and assessing writing.
Joel K Clements currently lives in Bend, Oregon, with his wife and three kids. Three? That can’t be right. I have three kids? Holy hell.
He loves good conversation, the sound of laughter, whipped cream, sad songs at an uptempo beat, and trail running.
The Byronic Man 
April 15, 2011 at 6:10 pm
Oregon, huh? That’s cool. And yes, quite incomplete 🙂
April 15, 2011 at 7:53 pm
Shamefully incomplete is an understatement. Yet mine is the same. 😀 It will come. lol
April 16, 2011 at 6:36 am
Someone should really teach a class on writing bios without sounding like a braggart or a bore, shouldn’t they? Thanks for reading, though.
April 16, 2011 at 6:16 pm
I live in Oregon . . . I love it here. My dog’s name is Byron. If it helps, he is the only dog I know or have ever known, that bares that name. also, he is really cute. =0)
I enjoyed your posts! Thanks for sharing!
~Stace
June 18, 2011 at 2:14 pm
*** So, if you’re reading this, wondering why the above comments seem to – at best – barely connect to the material in the bio, it’s not them, it’s me. They’re responding to a previous incarnation of the bio which basically said, “Garsh, I just don’t know what to write.”
June 22, 2011 at 6:47 am
I, too, can bench press and adult bull. Wait…
July 13, 2011 at 5:50 am
You’ll never believe this but I too am a brain surgeon and former Olympic kick-boxer !! Wait … wait … but I am accepted by wolves the world over … darn, for a second there I thought you might be my long lost brother !!
July 13, 2011 at 7:24 am
Well, I’ll still look forward to hanging out with you at the brain surgeon cage-fights.
July 27, 2011 at 9:41 pm
The pen name followed by a pen year made me laugh out loud. I always read bio’s before I read any of the posts. Whether or not I like the bio determines whether or not I read the blog. haha Which reminds me, if I read my bio, I would so not read my blog.
July 28, 2011 at 8:07 am
My bio was awful for a while. Not that it’s brilliant now, but I kind of dashed of something and forgot about it. Then thought, “It’s probably not a positive that I dread someone looking at the bio page…”
August 24, 2011 at 10:03 am
Awesome.
August 26, 2011 at 5:43 am
Simply delightful … definitely deserves a little strange adoration 😉
August 26, 2011 at 6:19 am
I know it’s just a typo, but I have to admit I’m a big fan of “strange adoration” as well. Thanks for reading.
August 28, 2011 at 10:57 pm
Hmmm … no typo … I’m a small part strange and a large part stranger so it logically followed that strange adoration would be an apt description … perhaps strange(r) adoration if we have to be pedantic.
August 29, 2011 at 6:22 am
Well, even better then! My humblest apologies for assuming it was a typo.
November 12, 2012 at 5:44 pm
gosh, how embarrassingly aberrant…
October 30, 2011 at 2:27 am
Rather interesting way to put a Bio out there Byron….like the Witty edge in your writing!!!
December 18, 2011 at 1:30 pm
Adoration-wise you have been nominated for a liebster by none other than myself!
It is at http://thepollyannafragments.wordpress.com/2011/12/18/nomination-jubilation-observation/
Cheers for the good work!
December 19, 2011 at 8:33 am
Thanks! I really appreciate the thought!
December 28, 2011 at 8:08 pm
Hi! I just wanted to let you know that I just nominated you for the “Versatile Blogger” award for WordPress! I had to write a post about my own nomiation- it’s a tradition, I guess.
If you decide to continue the posting tradition you need to:
1. write seven random things about yourself
2. nominate 15 bloggers that you follow
3. put the “Versatile Blogger” picture (you can find it on my blog on the very first post on the homepage) on your post.
Happy Blogging! : )
December 29, 2011 at 8:14 am
Thanks, I appreciate the nod!
March 21, 2012 at 5:23 pm
I tagged you in a post! 🙂
March 22, 2012 at 6:14 am
Thanks!
May 1, 2012 at 11:44 am
Now I’d like to go crack a XX
May 2, 2012 at 9:05 am
I have dubbed thee a Sunshine Award winner! You’re very welcome, no thanks needed, unless you want to send money. http://genesismeranda.wordpress.com/2012/05/02/awards-speeches-and-honourable-mentions/
May 2, 2012 at 2:38 pm
Excellent. Let me know when the awards ceremony is. I need to get a tux!
May 6, 2012 at 11:02 am
I think you’re adorable! (you know, and witty and all that, too…)
May 19, 2012 at 4:02 pm
Hey, how did I miss this comment? I double compliment and I missed it for 2 weeks?
Well, thanks. And thanks.
May 24, 2012 at 3:31 pm
Someone just told me your whole face was now on your About page, so I had to come see for myself. You did it! I hope people don’t follow you just for your good looks now. You’re so much more than that. Just ask Sexy Stalin.
You know I lurrrrve your blog. More than anyone else’s. Don’t tell the others.
May 27, 2012 at 2:06 am
Based on your profile/gravatar thing, I had pictured you looking just like Ryan from the Office, but now that I’ve seen your whole face, I don’t think you look like him at all. Strange how deceiving a little half-face thumbnail photo is! Some people ought to try going half-face on the dating websites…it might give them a little extra luck! 😉
By the way, I nominated you for The Lovely Blog Award! You can read about it here: http://lostonplanetchina.wordpress.com/2012/05/27/my-first-blog-award/ . I started reading back when you posted about your wife getting all emotional over lame Christmas movies, and you have kept me laughing ever since! 😀
May 27, 2012 at 7:05 am
Thanks for saying so, and for the nod.
Sorry for not looking like Ryan. That would actually be a good face-fit for my writing. I’ll see what I can do. I get “you look like…” a lot, none more so than Patrick Dempsey. We’ve looked alike basically as long as I’ve known what he looked like.
May 29, 2012 at 7:01 pm
I just saw this comment reply. So. Even our ALTER EGOS could be besties?!?! Ha ha! http://www.variety.com/graphics/photos/vpage2004/vcrix_dempsey.jpg
May 30, 2012 at 6:18 am
Oh, I remember that photo – that was when we were at the Bloggies, right?
June 14, 2012 at 12:14 pm
Sounds like you’re cooler than the Dos Equis guy.
June 14, 2012 at 12:57 pm
So…you read all the bloggers I read (and played 20 questions w/ most of ’em!), you write humor, you kinda rock — why haven’t I come across your site before?
Hmmm…I guess the Freshly Pressed gods actually got it right this time.
Congrats. And nice to “meet” you. If by “meet” I mean “happen upon your blog and realize I should be a stalker of…”
😉
June 14, 2012 at 3:06 pm
I adore you strangely.
June 14, 2012 at 6:13 pm
You’re a funny man. I dig the blog and will continue to read it i suppose.
cheers!
June 15, 2012 at 5:03 am
Here take some adoration! 😉
June 15, 2012 at 5:33 am
You are a fox, Byronic man. 😛
June 15, 2012 at 8:29 am
Well, all this is quite ironic, Byronic. Some worth putting thought into.
I will comment on three.
First: I have rewritten my bio at least three times. Now I’m on the fourth, which is far much more the real me—not published yet. Mine have been much too “stiff” and I want to relax a bit, now that I see the blogging world more warm and friendly than I thought. I finally feel I can be more transparent.
Second: I keep my Gravatar and personal photo private because I am a famous movie star and blogging is the only place I can be my true self. Yes, my name is pen, too, for obvious reasons.
Third: You are gutsy to post your picture as you are quite handsome and now will have lovesick females after you. Alas, no need to worry about me as I am one of those aging but attractive stars. I still manage to turn some heads, which totally shocks me. I still have bodyguards and if younger you might have seen one show up at your door to snatch you. But not for reasons you think. I thrive most on intellect and humor and so enjoy your skewed thinking.
Peace,
Alexandria
P.S. I can already read your mind—”this person is full of it. Another anonymous blogging female vying for my attention.” But …
all of the above is true.
Hmm.. Um… Well… Not quite. You guessed it. I’m not a movie star, but the rest is.
And the truth is there are real reasons involving security that I have to protect my identity. The blogging world is exceptionally understanding of this and still provides a reasonable outlet for the right brain in me.
I look forward to your humor. You are the first humor blog I’m following.
December 12, 2012 at 8:17 am
So I was re-doing my About Page (like you, I’m constantly coming back to it) and saw that, somehow, I’d missed your thorough and thoughtful comment. Sorry about that. I think that was a week that I’d been freshly pressed AND I was away on vacation, so a number of comments slipped by me. Still, how ungrateful of me. But, six months later, here I am… I’m the Ringo Starr of comment responders (“Regarding your letter of April, 1972…”).
I went back and forth on the photo thing. I held off for quite a while, wanting the writing to sink or swim on its own merits. Then I added a couple photos in order to add a little personal element. Community always seems like such an important part of blogging, and it was missing from so many of my little humor missives.
In any case, I hope you’re still reading and writing, and thanks again for the thoughtful input.
December 12, 2012 at 11:49 am
Grins! So thoughtful of you to reply back, albeit it 6 months later. You just went way high up on the niceness scale in my book!
Yes, that was the week that was—Freshly Pressed. I was just in one of those moods and got carried away … humor can do that to a person. Since I am older than you I can get away with saying you’re cute. But it’s all in good fun I’ll have you kinow.
Yes, I’m still writing. Rewrote my “About” AGAIN. I still read your blog on occasion. Even wrote a caption for one of those crazy photos you put up sometimes.
I totally LOL on some of your stuff. Still enjoying but unable to read everything due to my own blog’s growth. Not sure if FP will EVER notice me. But that’s okay. My little flock keeps me very happy.
I’m still shy about the photos but I did post some of me taking pictures on WP Special Inspirational Challenge.
Merry Christmas to you my nice friend,
Alexandria
June 15, 2012 at 8:52 am
Okay… I’ve become a follower. Maybe it was the secret sauce, the acceptance by bears… or maybe it was just because.
June 15, 2012 at 9:35 am
It never hurts to have the bears on your side…
June 15, 2012 at 4:23 pm
Neurosurgeon would have sounded more sophisticated. 🙂
Is the adult bull wearing spandex?
June 15, 2012 at 8:58 pm
I’m more of the “people’s” surgeon.
June 16, 2012 at 5:36 am
Totally obsessed with you, the byronic man! my days dont go too well without a little dosage of your slapstick humor. you are adorable, btw.
June 16, 2012 at 7:28 pm
Wow, you make my brain hurt. I have a feeling your students (whose brains can take a lot more than mine can) are very lucky. Love your writing.
Blessings,
Alyson
June 19, 2012 at 10:00 am
Best “author” intro ever lol.
June 19, 2012 at 2:02 pm
Thanks for saying so!
June 23, 2012 at 6:29 pm
My pleasure 🙂
June 21, 2012 at 5:38 pm
I’m stranger and I adore your intro. (I thought I subscribed ages ago and you just didn’t care to have me reading. I am sorry for the oversight — mostly because it looks like I’ve missed great stuff!).
June 21, 2012 at 5:47 pm
Ditto – I really thought I’d subscribed to your site months ago. Well, all is right with the cosmos.
July 12, 2012 at 8:10 am
Hahaha! I never saw this! I guess I am in denial about reading glasses and the type is reeeeeally small on the black bar….
I love that you did the circuit. I really enjoyed going to comedy clubs. My nephew’s wife was in 2nd City. I think she is going back when their son is a little older. Now all of your posts make sense. the public speaking, the commercials…are you auditioning for any movie roles?
July 12, 2012 at 8:12 am
I guess I didn’t read this yet. I don’t know how I missed it. Swimming with dolphins, huh? Must be your charm. Thanks for doing a blog. You must keep writing. You’re very talented and an absolute delight. Do you have anything published or is there a book in your future?
July 12, 2012 at 5:04 pm
This is a bajillion times better than my bio! I don’t consider what I do writing, I spew incoherent thoughts and make terrible puns.
And I’m sorry but I need to make fun of your semi-scornful writers photo. Are you sitting on the floor? Where are you, the rec center’s basement men’s bathroom?
GET OFF THE FLOOR!
On that note, if you actually don’t have legs or something, I apologize.
Love love.
July 12, 2012 at 5:13 pm
No, the whole photo is much more benign. I’m standing outside… something… I forget. I needed some shots of myself so scrounged for one’s that worked as portraits. I keep meaning to get some new images, but then laziness kicks in…
July 12, 2012 at 5:17 pm
No no, this is perfect. We’ll take it as a parody of a cliche writer/slash etc-rer. I know many. All pretentious. Minus you. Must be the America thing?
July 17, 2012 at 12:29 pm
NOMINATION!!! Please copy and paste award from my site here and follow the rules to accept (it’s OK if you choose not to): http://fortyteencandles.wordpress.com/2012/07/17/you-like-me-you-really-like-me/
July 18, 2012 at 6:04 am
Hi…I love your blog and decided to nominate you for the Versatile Blogger award. I know you’ve been here, done that, so no worries if you’d rather not participate. Thank you!
August 6, 2012 at 8:37 am
Congratulations! Because I enjoy reading your blog so very much, I’ve nominated you for the One Lovely Blog Award! I hope you’ll accept!
http://diatribesandovations.com/awards/
August 9, 2012 at 8:25 pm
What the… I thought I had subscribed to your blog a LONG time ago. Great stuff!
September 21, 2012 at 2:06 pm
You may not want another award, but I am nominating you for The Booker Award. Yes THE Booker Award! No, not THE Booker Award. Check out my blog in a day or two and read all about it… 🙂
September 21, 2012 at 2:51 pm
Cool! Thanks! I’m not even familiar with that one – I may “accidentally” slip up on the name and tell people I was nominated for the Booker Prize, and when people ask if I’m British, change the subject.
October 3, 2012 at 8:51 am
Sorry, just need a tiny bit of clarification. Which Casion Royale specifically? It will swing the vote I am sure.
October 3, 2012 at 3:04 pm
The remake. Although I certainly have my Wood Allen moments…
October 11, 2012 at 9:47 am
Hey pretty boy,
I know shit is going to become quite busy for you with the birth of new baby… But before everything breaks, just wanted to wish you and your partner a healthy and loving birth. What’s coming is magical. Speak soon, Monsieur Byronic.
Eric (Le Clown)
November 17, 2012 at 9:02 am
B-Man, I’m honored that you hit my Subscribe button. Seriously. I’ve been trying to think of something clever to say about it, but nothing is coming. Wouldn’t you know it? Struck boring by a fit of emotion. Thanks, man.
December 1, 2012 at 4:32 am
Oh you are so cute… if that is really you? Teaching High School classes? I did that for awhile… bless you!
December 1, 2012 at 8:24 am
That is, indeed, me. Thanks for saying so.
And yeah, a lot of people teach because it’s rewarding and such – I’m just in it for the big, fat paychecks.
December 5, 2012 at 10:45 am
I have been following you for quite some time now, but never seem to make it to your posts. My WordPress reader has either failed me, or I am stupid. That’s a toss up.
I’ll fix it though.
December 5, 2012 at 11:03 am
Something happened with WP a few months back and people just vanished from the Reader lists. My daily readership dropped in half almost over night. Being the depressive type, I assumed everyone was collectively over me. Found out a lot of people had the same troubles.
One thing you can do is un-follow, and then re-follow. That seems to fix it.
Thanks for remembering me, though!
December 5, 2012 at 11:05 am
Well your face is VERY… memorable.
December 6, 2012 at 12:05 pm
But the real question everyone wants to know is, what is the true pronunciation of Oregon?
December 6, 2012 at 3:09 pm
It’s pronounced “Washington.” Weird, right?
March 19, 2013 at 9:47 pm
Hey Byronic witty-funny-amazing Man! Not sure if you’re an awards person; I’ve nominated you for the Very Inspiring Blogger Award! It’s just amazing to me how you can make everything funny while I feel like down about the crap that goes on around me. You can check out the details here: http://rusticrecluse.wordpress.com/2013/03/20/very-inspiring-blogger-award/
Cheers!
April 7, 2013 at 4:43 pm
Congratulations, Byronic Man! I’ve just nominated you for the Super Sweet Blogging Award: http://curatorofcuriosities.com/2013/04/07/super-sweet-blogging-nominations/ Looking forward to your .. Byronic answers!
April 8, 2013 at 5:53 am
Thank you for thinking of me! That was very… what’s the word I’m looking for… “Sweet”! That’s it!
April 8, 2013 at 8:44 pm
You look like McDreamy.
April 9, 2013 at 6:54 am
Thanks for saying so (assuming that’s not meant as a bad thing). We’ve always looked a lot alike, Patrick Dempsey and I. But he’s stuck with some popular TV show, while I’ve gone on to be a popular blogger! Ha ha! Take THAT, Dempsey!
April 9, 2013 at 10:15 am
Wait until you get hired by NASA… Demspey can’t take THAT!
May 9, 2013 at 12:52 pm
I have just discovered your blog and at the same time was nominated for the Shine On award. So, because you’ve given me something new and bright and shiny, I hope you will accept this from me.
May 28, 2013 at 1:50 pm
Ok here’s to an angel getting its wings…..you suddenly appeared in my reader along the lines of ‘here is a blogger you might like’ ..now generaly ole Sugar does not click random blogs but I did and now I’m intregued ! So being Welsh and nosy I am going to walk round your blog gwrden….oh pleased to meet you btw 😉
May 28, 2013 at 2:50 pm
I meant blog garden…useless with a touchscreen !
May 29, 2013 at 6:22 am
Well, thanks for coming by. I hoping it was worth your while!
May 29, 2013 at 7:26 pm
Hi Byronic Man,
Would you be willing to participate in something we are doing for Susie Lindau on Friday morning? I am contacting as many of her followers as possible. My thought is that we all post on our own blogs on Friday with the same title, “Susie Strong”. The content would say something simple like, We are thinking of you. I haven’t known Susie for long but this blogging world is such a family. I thought it would be nice for her to see this message from as many of us as possible. Her husband is going to be updating us after her surgery. He can tell her or she can see it once she is up to it. Are you in? Thanks, Maria aka brickhousechick
June 13, 2013 at 12:59 pm
You + blog = Amazing. But I must disclose, I am awful at math.
June 13, 2013 at 3:27 pm
Well, I’m not great at it either, but in this case, I have to admit, I’m willing to accept your calculations without checking. Thanks for saying so, and for coming by.
June 20, 2013 at 4:56 pm
Hi
Pleased to meet you. :).
My name is Kevin Gillespie, I do, MUCH prefer to be called Kev though. :).
I live in Wales, & am now Following your Blog. :).
Best Wishes
Kev. 🙂
August 12, 2013 at 8:52 am
This blog is fantastic! I too am a comedian and I’m starting to discover, as you obviously already have, that dumbing down material is what the audience likes sometimes…
But hell nah, I ain’t dumb down nothin’!!
August 13, 2013 at 5:33 am
Like what you have going on over here. Looking forward to following your blog!
August 15, 2013 at 7:56 am
Hey there! So happy I found your blog – I’m loving it. Cheers.
August 15, 2013 at 9:15 am
Thanks for coming by, and for letting me know you’re enjoying it!
August 31, 2013 at 9:24 am
So glad I found your blog, but I think I may be harboring feelings of resentment towards you. Oh well, bygones.
September 2, 2013 at 10:51 am
Let me know if I can help. I’m something of an expert of resenting others.
And thanks for coming by.
November 10, 2013 at 2:33 pm
I usually answer (or comment on) humor with humor (my own often-undecipherable version of it). But I’m especially moved by this passage:
“…he was becoming someone he didn’t like very much, someone who cared more about the adoration of strangers than building close friendships, he was tired of dumbing down his humor, much of his life had become dedicated to developing the superficial parts of his life, he was starting to really hate everyone,…and starting to abandon ideas of morality and honor that he’d always felt strongly about.”
So I simply wanted to say, I admire the presence of mind and attention to self-evolution that brought you to those conclusions, and look forward to reading your work.
November 11, 2013 at 1:50 pm
Thanks, and thanks for taking the time to say so. Funnily enough, the post tomorrow touches on that transition in a kinda-sorta roundabout way.
November 17, 2013 at 2:00 pm
This is seriously the coolest, funniest, awesomest blog I’ve ever seen! So glad I found it.
November 18, 2013 at 2:20 pm
Thanks for saying so, and for stopping by!
December 13, 2013 at 9:18 am
Okay Stick man, have you ever met a bear from Russia? Nope, neither have I. But it sounds like you’re from Russia because I too have 4 jobs here minus the one I left in the states (nope I don’t work for the C.I.A.). This means I have 5 titles and no girlfriend, hard to do very well while trying to disassemble a bomb. Why you ask, because the Mafia (by the way they all look like bears) wants a piece of my action here. So I’ve learned to move quickly and that means no need to diet cause there’s no time to eat. I stopped by to see if James Bond would visit “Life in Russia” to help spice up the act if you catch my drift. And to complete any real good Russian story there needs to be a “James Bond”. Signed LeChiffre
January 3, 2014 at 4:54 pm
Hey- I just nominated you for a “very inspirational blogger” award, congrats! Check out the link on my blog: http://30yearoldknowitall.com/2014/01/04/the-very-inspiring-blogger-award/
January 5, 2014 at 1:55 pm
Thanks! I will be sure to stop by.
January 10, 2014 at 12:30 pm
Bahahaha – thanks for making me laugh out loud – hooray! Annnnnd follow.
January 17, 2014 at 2:47 pm
Cool, thanks!
February 16, 2014 at 12:23 pm
You mean there is no morality and honor in stand-up comedy? Sounds like the career for me.
February 17, 2014 at 5:05 pm
Your About Page is, frankly, the most magical piece of awesome that’s ever lit up my laptop screen.
February 18, 2014 at 7:57 am
Well thanks. I had to look at it again and saw a couple typos, so now I’m going to have to track down everyone who’s ever read it and demand they look again.
And thanks for coming by.
March 13, 2014 at 12:04 am
I deal with drunk people on a regular basis to! (but that’s actually the time I spend with my family :/)
May 5, 2014 at 3:52 pm
Awesome, funny stuff!
August 28, 2014 at 12:12 pm
The blog name drew me in but the Internet Survival story and Hire Me to Be an Astronaut sucked me in. Loving the stick figure diagrams – those are awesome! Looking forward to seeing you in my feed 🙂
September 4, 2014 at 7:14 am
You can bench press an adult bull?
I can bench press a bagel.
Who’s the impressive one now?
September 24, 2014 at 6:48 pm
I follow your blog and your picture/icon is featured on the far right hand side of my blog showing people who read my blogs what I read, perhaps you would like to tell some of my readers something about yourself and your blog. I will go with the odd/even method of interviewing (which I just made up), one question will call for a serious answer the other a less serious answer.
1. French fries: Shoestring, steak, curly, crinkle cut? What condiment(s) on them?
2. How long have you been blogging and why?
3. What odor/smell/fragrance to you is the most pleasant?
4. Favorite things to read? What genre? (you may expand on this if you so desire)
5. A boat you are riding in is about to capsize what did you do to contribute to this?
6. What is the best thing about blogging?
7. How much ground can a ground hog, hog, if a ground hog could hog ground?
8. What is the worst thing about blogging?
9. If you could force one famous person to read your blog who would you force, and how much would you force them to read?
10. Where do you hope blogging will lead you too?
Will be posting your interview on a Saturday if you respond. aaforringer@gmail.com
December 16, 2014 at 9:16 am
You have a clever, witty blog, with clever witty commenters. I am not worthy, but am here to learn… 😉
April 6, 2015 at 12:21 pm
Well, thanks… I’ve been dormant so long, I suspect I no longer deserve the accolades, but thanks.
February 27, 2015 at 2:14 pm
They were strangers who met a blog lifetime ago, she from one coast, he from the other. Both of them on a mission to make themselves and others laugh. At least sometimes. Kidding! You at least are funny as ever. Nice to check in w a fellow Portlander. Portlandian? Portlandite?