Shot a commercial the other day in which I played the dramatic and exciting role of “man whose life is ridiculously cool and happy because he has mobile banking.” All in all, the shoot went fine. They say that 75% of acting is being able to hit your marks, and I think I hit all the important ones.
The “diva” mark: I’d told them when I was available, they needed me another time. I said I’d try to make it work, then hit them with really, really specific demands. I know how shoots go, you can’t say “When it hits noon, I have to get in the car, whether we’ve got the shots or not.” But that is exactly what I said. I also said I’d totally understand if they wanted to use someone else. I think they would have, but the client wanted me. Most people were good-humored about it. A couple, though, when I apologized for the demands, could only muster a subdued, “Yeah, well…”
The ACTOR! mark: Okay, it had more to do with opening myself to the camera, and thus ventilating, but the shoot was in full sun and when we were done my off-camera side was completely stained and wrinkled with sweat, but my on-camera side was dry and crisp. Everyone was duly impressed at the extent to which I’ve trained my body. Even my pores are professional.
The *Star* mark: These two women who were extras kept flirting with me. I got the distinct feeling it was fueled by my being the center of attention. I wanted to say, “You know this is a commercial, right? For a bank? There’s nothing sexy going on here.” Maybe they just love a man who can selectively sweat.
The “Creative Differences” mark: “You want me to put Splenda in my espresso? I know this character. He’s hip. He’s together. He’s classy. He ain’t putting no god damn Splenda in no god damn espresso.”
The “this isn’t my first dance” mark: Received check at 3:45. Deposited check at 3:53.