WordPress, it seems, is always looking for ways to improve its sense of community, and finding ways for bloggers to find and connect with each other. Also, they seem to enjoy having your “follow” lists blink in and out, so that sometimes you’re following a blog, then you aren’t, so you re-follow, then suddenly you’re getting two notifications each time they post, and that seems a little excessive, but you hate to un-follow them… but that’s a separate issue.
A “button” button might also be nice.
The real issue is all the buttons they provide for getting involved with people’s posts. But, in their ongoing efforts to improve, what other buttons could they include for you to have?
For the tortured artist types who like to be fueled by torment: “This was good… probably the last good thing you’ll write”
For people providing recipes: “My aunt made this once and we all got food poisoning.”
For people writing humor: “Coffee came out my nose.”
Well, okay, I do own a TV, but only because I won it… in a reading contest. And sometimes I’m setting books down and they land on the remote and turn on Project Runway for 4 hours at a time…
For people writing about television: “I don’t own a television and felt compelled to make sure you know that.”
For commenters: “I hit ‘submit’ on my comment, and a microsecond spotted my typo. I hate that.”
For general purpose: “I am having chest pains. Please call an ambulance.”
See? The possibilities are just endless!
But what else? For the Weekly Question of the Week this week: What new buttons would you like to see on WordPress?
P.S. Also – a few of you may have noticed that yesterday did not reveal finalists for last week, or a new featured blogger. Part of that was because I was writing about Adam Yauch passing away, part of it was because last week I was in the midst of a shameless attempt to Jules’ contest over at Go Guilty Pleasures, and so the question of the week was barely a question; so we’ll gloss over that, and continue the voting for best poem, and the current Featured Blogger.
The Byronic Man 
May 6, 2012 at 8:48 am
I would have used “The Coffee Came Out My Nose” button a lot on your page. I would like to see a button that says “All the really clever comments have already been posted!”
Oh, and a big congrats to 1pointperspective for being able to sneak in an extra week as blogger of the week because of your gloss over. I’m thinking he earned it for being a “bridesmaid” so many times. 😉
May 7, 2012 at 6:23 am
I hear you on the “All the clever comments” button. Maybe even a more emphatic, “Damnit, I REALLY wanted to make that joke!”
May 6, 2012 at 8:50 am
One button I could really use:
I’d love to leave a comment, but to be honest, your writing is so good I’m intimidated and scared and can’t come up with anything clever to leave as a comment to save my life so I’ll just click this button instead to play it safe, but to also let you know I am simultaneously in awe and very jealous of you.
May 6, 2012 at 8:51 am
I’d like to take a moment here to also say I do believe I coined the phrase ‘coffee came out my nose’. I sure as hell use it enough. So….what do I win, B-man?
May 7, 2012 at 6:24 am
Any time coffee comes out someone’s nose while reading a blog, they owe you 55 cents.
May 6, 2012 at 9:08 am
A choice of two buttons “read in full but too tired to comment” and “skimmed, bored, didn’t finish”. Just so we know what 96 page views REALLY means.
May 7, 2012 at 6:26 am
On the flip side, a “I read this twice, thoroughly, and then once to someone else” even if it’s a lie. Kind of like how newspapers base their readership on x-number of people reading the paper per subscription, or per copy they leave in airports. Just to make ourselves feel better.
May 6, 2012 at 10:05 am
I could use a button that simply says, “It’s “you’re,” not “your.”
May 7, 2012 at 6:27 am
Ditto, “There/their/they’re” and “to/too.”
May 7, 2012 at 6:29 am
Exactly.
May 7, 2012 at 6:40 am
I could use a “like” button for these comments.
May 6, 2012 at 10:15 am
How about a button which says “I just posted a piece about that same topic several hours ago and your post is funnier – thanks for making me look stoopid!”
On an unrelated topic; your lack of attention to the contest will result in my lovely bald pate staying up on your blog for another day?! Yee-Haw!
May 7, 2012 at 6:28 am
It could be in the form of a threatening legal letter. “The humor levels of your post constitute a threat to the mental well-being of author 1. Please cease and desist…”
May 7, 2012 at 2:25 pm
nothing gets the chuckles going like that fancy lawyer talk!
May 6, 2012 at 10:19 am
You may, or may not, remember my previous posts “WordPress Buttons I’d Like to See” http://k8edid.wordpress.com/2011/08/17/wordpress-buttons-id-like-to-see/ and “More WordPress Buttons I’d Like to See” http://k8edid.wordpress.com/2011/11/15/more-wordpress-buttons-id-like-to-see/
Apparently, my “theme” is one of the few that allows you to bed visual thingies in your comments
There are some others, but today I’d like to see one that says “Don’t forget to unclick the little box unless you want a bazillion e-mails, Dumbass” and “Follow This Blogger – Good Luck with Getting any of My Posts, Sucker”.
May 6, 2012 at 10:24 am
Hm, maybe there should be an “Apparently I just ripped you off, but I didn’t mean to” button.
May 6, 2012 at 10:27 am
Oh, we can’t be the only folks to have ever thought of it. There is nothing new under the sun, except maybe undiagnosed melanomas.
It is really fun (but a lot of work) to put my replies in “button” form on my posts.
Now, if you will excuse me, I must go plunder the blogosphere for ideas I can rip off…
May 6, 2012 at 10:29 am
Oh, and I’ve worn out the “This was Freshly Pressed?” button.
May 6, 2012 at 10:57 am
So I will make that my official entry into the Question of the Week. Now I’ll leave you alone.
May 6, 2012 at 3:07 pm
K8, I love you…
May 7, 2012 at 6:30 am
A secondary “tantrum-based” button might be nice for the “This was FP?” That communicates all the “I work really hard and look how funny and everyone should love me” feelings that slip out briefly.
May 6, 2012 at 10:41 am
I’d like an eject button so that I’d know how many times people bailed halfway through my post and exactly where it happened. Not that they DO, but just in case…
May 7, 2012 at 6:31 am
“bored now” button in the margins, maybe.
May 6, 2012 at 11:26 am
What about a “meh” button for a post you read to the end, but weren’t sure it was a great use of the last five minutes of your life. I think my blog would be splattered with that one.
May 7, 2012 at 6:32 am
Or even a “I’m sure that seemed funny to you, at the moment…”
May 6, 2012 at 11:33 am
How about “I’m way too polite to tell you this post sucked”?
May 7, 2012 at 6:33 am
“I thought it was great, but this guy reading over my shoulder thought it was sloppy, derivative, and clearly hastily written. Isn’t that guy rude?”
May 6, 2012 at 11:59 am
The Morning After “I’m really sorry I posted this on your blog while I was drinking last night, I’m not as funny as I thought” button.
May 6, 2012 at 5:10 pm
Awesome!
May 7, 2012 at 6:34 am
Or for the mid-drinking comments, a button that follows your own comment with “Oh, man, I am hi-LAR-ious!”
May 7, 2012 at 7:10 am
Heh, I would probably use that one, as well.
May 6, 2012 at 12:22 pm
How about a bailout button for those who’re watching Bolivian porn to switch to “Philosophers We All Know And Love” website? Not that I’d need it.
May 7, 2012 at 6:34 am
The internet being what it is, there’s probably one that combines the two.
May 6, 2012 at 12:55 pm
I only want one….Edit your Comment
May 7, 2012 at 6:35 am
I’m really surprised they haven’t put that in. It can’t be all that problematic, code-wise, can it?
May 6, 2012 at 2:23 pm
“Detonate.”
May 7, 2012 at 6:36 am
Very nice.
May 6, 2012 at 2:24 pm
I think they should beef up the ‘like’ button to, “I like this post, I like you, and you’re also very attractive.”
May 7, 2012 at 6:39 am
“If I’m ever in Jaipur, what say I look you up?” *wink, wink*
May 6, 2012 at 2:44 pm
The latest is WP started automatically checking the “Notify me of follow-up comments via email,” so we get every comment on posts we comment on UNLESS we uncheck the box before we “submit comments.”
I think they should have grades of the like button such as “kinda like,” “really like, and LOVE!
May 7, 2012 at 6:39 am
Maybe a “Notify me by email if something I’ve just GOT to see happens.”
May 6, 2012 at 3:05 pm
Not unlike Facebook, I feel there is a clear need for a Dislike button. Perhaps in varying gradations: “Dislike”… “Intensely Dislike”… “Hate”… “I Don’t Even Know What This Means”… “WTF Is Your Problem, A–hole?”… and “On Second Thought, Maybe I DO Favor Internet Censorship”
Also: “How Is It Possible You Have More Followers Than Me? Are They All Your Mother?”… “You’re an Idiot”… “Not Everyone Should Write A Blog, You Know”… “Here’s A Link To ‘Hooked On Phonics'” (I could go on…)
And the less hateful: “Read Dutifully As Subscription Implies But Have Nothing Useful To Contribute To Comments, Just Want You To Know I’m Still Reading Your Work”… “Yes, Totally Agree”… “OMG We’re the Same Person”… “Brilliant”… “Finally, Someone Who Understands Me”…
Huh. I may have gone on a bit of a button bender.
May 7, 2012 at 6:40 am
On the followers button, I’ve thought about the need for a “So, is your family enormous? Are you in an extremely large sorority?”
May 6, 2012 at 4:29 pm
For the pervert: “Click this button for a live, nude reading of this post.”
May 7, 2012 at 6:41 am
You know, I bet that one would actually drive up your hit counts.
May 7, 2012 at 7:08 am
Well, I wasn’t referring to my own blog with that suggestion. I’m pretty sure I’d lose more than I’d gain. 🙂
May 6, 2012 at 5:11 pm
A variation on 1pointperspective’s button –
I would like the “Kevin Bacon” button, whic notifies you if a blogger within seven degrees of separation has blogged about the same subject within the last month so you can avoid looking like an idiot ….
May 7, 2012 at 6:42 am
And if someone writes about it later so you can get indignant and absurdly self-righteous.
May 6, 2012 at 5:15 pm
An “I didn’t read this whole post but I know it’s been a while since I stopped by and I don’t want you to think I don’t read or like you anymore.” button. I wouldn’t use it but I certainly know bloggers who should.
Your TV caption might be one of the best captions I’ve read in ages and proves that I really should take the time to write captions like I once did. Maybe if I wasn’t too busy watching TV.
May 7, 2012 at 6:43 am
I could use an “I’m sorry I don’t come by more often! I want to, I swear! Oh my God, there just aren’t enough hours in the day, are there?” button.
May 6, 2012 at 8:04 pm
Hilarious ..Oh i loved that food poisoning button option..
Given a choice i would love to have a
“what does that even mean” , ” my soul left my body while i tried to understand what you wrote” Or a simple “????” button..
May 7, 2012 at 6:44 am
Maybe an “I may actually be slightly dumber for having read that” button.
May 6, 2012 at 10:02 pm
New button: “Wow, great post–it took my roomful of monkeys with typewriters two whole days to replicate it.”
May 7, 2012 at 6:46 am
Are you a Simpsons fan? I can’t read “roomful of monkeys” without thinking of the episode in which Mr. Burns chains a thousand monkeys to typewriters so that eventually they’ll write the greatest novel of all time. Then he reads over one’s shoulder, “It was the best of times, it was the… blurst of times?? You stupid monkey!”
May 6, 2012 at 11:54 pm
For the obsessive-compulsive: “Make sure that you click this button; never mind why, just click it to be sure that you clicked it, because if you don’t you’ll have to click this button again to make absolutely double-sure that you clicked it properly.”
May 7, 2012 at 6:46 am
“You didn’t click the button an odd number of times, did you? You might want to start over.”
May 7, 2012 at 6:15 am
I would add a “This really wasn’t your best work. Gupta Sangya could do better,” button. It’s my most inspirational spam comment. That I get repeatedly. From Gupta himself.
May 7, 2012 at 6:47 am
That’s fantastic.
May 7, 2012 at 6:48 am
Ha ha ha! I can see a lot of use for this one.
May 7, 2012 at 10:07 am
A button that says “Click here to get $$$”, but that secretly takes them to my blog.
May 8, 2012 at 6:37 am
“Click here to get Freshly Pressed” Oh, oops, was that the “subscribe everyone on my email list” button?
May 7, 2012 at 10:24 am
I could use a ‘fix-it-now’ button on my dashboard under ‘all posts’.
May 8, 2012 at 6:39 am
I would like a “Funny this up about 15%” button.
May 7, 2012 at 1:01 pm
“You must be Catholic” – a button for all those parental blogs discussing children and how they’re expecting…again!
May 8, 2012 at 6:38 am
Or feeling guilty about everything. “You must be Catholic. Or Jewish.”
May 8, 2012 at 8:00 am
That applies to every religion! 🙂
May 7, 2012 at 9:59 pm
I’d like to see a button “So sorry you’re sick, hope you feel better soon” in addition to the Like button, so you don’t end up saying you like someone is sick.
I’d also like a button “Huh?” for those blogs you’ve just wasted 10 minutes reading & they made no sense
And how about a “Good try” button for when you’re not sure what else to say
May 8, 2012 at 6:25 am
That’s actually a good idea – some sort of “I appreciate this post.” When someone shares the abuse they suffered as a child, or discusses the death of a beloved pet, it feels a bit macabre to “like” it.
May 8, 2012 at 9:35 pm
You get right on that Byronic Man & if you need back up, the Byromaniacs will be right behind you.
May 8, 2012 at 7:01 am
Okay, I need a button that says: I have nothing new to add, but I read every $#$%$# word of this post and comments, so I want you to know I was here.
May 8, 2012 at 2:17 pm
The reps got an “easy button” that really works. I got to use it today when I asked WTF a client meant by “mortar and pestle more like 100 years ago.” How the fuck “older-fashioned” do you get than the mortar and pestle we designed for you? IT’S A MORTAR AND PESTLE! And btw, that’s fine that they want a change but “like 100 years ago?”
Here’s what they meant: remove the lines (or the sort of “woodprint” effect we’d used. Remove THE LINES? ::slaps Easy Button::
May 8, 2012 at 2:18 pm
…this is why I normally talk about coworkers and not clients. I yell less about coworkers; they amuse me. Clients usually make me mental-er.