The First Post: Come on in and have a seat. Thanks for being here. Everyone comfortable? Excellent…

So, here we are then.  Congratulations all around, everyone’s done a bang up job, and it’s going to be a great time, I’m sure, and I hate to be a “meeting guy” but, first thing’s first: some basic foundational points.

Yes, look, I know we’re all excited to get going, but there are just a couple things to get squared away.  Now, now just settle down, we’re all adults here!  People!  There’s plenty of time for wit and hilarity and wry observations – there’s just some housekeeping to do first, okay?  Thank you.

I know the obvious thing would be some big inaugural post, full of flash and grandeur, but we’re going to forego that for more of an ‘in medias res’ thing.  What?  It means “in the midst of things”…  I don’t know, Latin?…   No, I am not trying to be fancy, that’s just what it’s called!  We’re going with sort of a “soft-opening” so we can just, you know, hit the ground running.  I know some of you have given a lot of thought to how to properly launch this thing – yes, I saw the ice sculpture, it’s lovely… yes, I know you almost passed out twice blowing up the balloons, we’ve all got to make adjustments.  I’m just the messenger here, folks.

Very nice.

Look, it’s just that in many ways it’s a continuation of some older blogs and journals, right?  And, if we’re being totally honest, how many people are going to read back this far, right?  No, no, we just have to accept that as part of the deal.  Besides, the beauty is in the continuation, the evolution, isn’t it?  This isn’t up for discussion, I’m just… fine, objection noted.

Now, the name of the site.  No, it’s settled, we’re not going through this again, I just wanted to clarify a couple– yes, I know you think it’s too obscure of a reference, you’ve made that clear.  Now, the Bionic Man reference we’re pretty safe on, but honestly, without the literary reference don’t you think it’d be a little, I don’t know, simplistic?  Besides, I think we can all agree that the gang down in R & D did a top-notch job finding something smart yet current, ambitious yet self-deprecating.   How about a hand for R & D, huh?  That’s right!  I just want to be sure everyone’s on the same page regarding, you know, PR.

Well, sure, there may be some confusion that it has to do with being ‘ironic’, but is that so bad?  Satire often employs irony.  Byronic characters are in many ways inherently ironic.  They are too!  It’s kind of fun that it’s purely coincidence that the type of thinking, or literary characters Lord Byron created had a darkly comical irony, and his name would lead them to be called “byronic.”  Right?  No, I’m not going to repeat that, I just – okay, fine, it’s a little obscure.

The main thing is we just want people to have a good time, okay?  Maybe they feel welcome enough to join in the conversation, maybe these conversation lead to expanded versions of the essays, and so on.  That’s all I wanted to say, really.  Good?  Good.  End of meeting.  Feel free to take home one of those lovely balloons.

Okay, see? Too many.