Author Archives | The Byronic Man

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Recently voted "The Best Humor Site in America That I, Personally, Write," The Byronic Man is sometimes fiction, but sometimes autobiography. And sometimes cultural criticism. Oh, and occasionally reviews. Okay, it's all those different things, but always humorous. Except on the occasions that it's not. Ah, geez. Look, it's a lot of things, okay? You might like it, is the point.

I Coulda Been A Freshly Pressed Contender…

March 28, 2013

46 Comments

(The short version: Please head over to Peg-O-Leg’s Ramblings for today’s actual piece) Ah, Freshly Pressed. Is there any title, any endowment, more electric around these parts? And the lengths we’ll go to earn the favor of our beloved WordPress overlords run a pretty wide gamut. There’s the rational (250-450 words, topical, clever title) to […]

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Please Hire Me To Be A Twisty Human Car Model

March 25, 2013

51 Comments

Ah, I see that you, Australian artist Emma hack, are working on another “automobile made of painted people.”  There’s also those Canadian Ford ads doing something similar. Tough stuff, getting the right people for something like that.  Got to go for the top tier of models.  Sure, the people you got for the previous one […]

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March Caption Contest: Gun-Control Debate Edition

March 24, 2013

32 Comments

As Congressmen on both sides of the aisle continue to debate over the best way to completely abandon the gun control question without looking like careerist cowards, the issue of guns in America continues to be at the forefront of people’s minds, on all sides of the issue. But for today let’s turn our attention, […]

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Tremble In Awe At The Mighty Power of Baby Giggles.

March 21, 2013

56 Comments

So things have been unusually serious here lately: Sunday I got all mopey and dour about how I don’t like St. Patrick’s Day.  Then Tuesday the verdict came out with the Steubenville rape and there was the media “spin” on that and all I could publish was semi-coherent anger… Miraculously I still have some readers. […]

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We Are Better Than This.

March 19, 2013

105 Comments

By now you may have heard about the guilty verdict given in the horrifying Steubenville rape trial.  You may also have heard the disgust at the manner in which it’s been reported. Here’s the CNN clip on the verdict: You know, you think we’ve evolved past this – both the callousness of the crime, and […]

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Time Once Again For: The Ruinin’ O’ The Festivities

March 17, 2013

46 Comments

Well, St Patrick’s Day is upon us again, and you know what that means!  No, not that… No, not that either… Okay, I’ll just tell you.  It’s time for my annual Why I Don’t Like St. Patrick’s Day Buzzkill!  Yay! Yes, loyal readers, I have been – in my more dramatically self-indulgent periods – the […]

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Takin’ Out The Trash, Trivia-Style

March 15, 2013

47 Comments

Last weekend there was a big trivia bee to raise money for schools.  I was asked to be on a team and – because of my nerdiness – jumped at it.  I didn’t think much of it, but as it got closer, it became more and more apparent that this wasn’t a little “Hey, have […]

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When In Amsterdam, Do As The Amsterdam…ian…er…ites… Do.

March 11, 2013

55 Comments

Continuing from the first part of the story, getting to Amsterdam during my senior year of college…  One of the things that came with being a “sampler’s pack” of backpackers was that we all had differing agendas.  We tried to overlap them, but this led to some, let’s say, conflicts of interest. Southern Belle went […]

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