Tag Archives: autobiographical

Oh, A “Yard Sale”? Sure, That’s Just What The Government Wants You To Think.

October 15, 2012

21 Comments

*** While The Byronic Man learns the answer to the query, “4 should be fine.  I mean, how many burp cloths could a person possibly need?” please enjoy this old, uh, classic post.  *** Okay, pop quiz, hot shot… You’re at a yard sale.  Why are you at a yard sale?  I don’t know, maybe […]

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There’s A First Time For Everything. Sometimes Two First Times.

July 12, 2012

66 Comments

As many of you know, I used to be – once upon a time – a full-time stand up comedian.  The end of that is summarized briefly on my Let’s Meet The Author page (perhaps a more detailed recollection will be here one of these days).  But for some reason I was just thinking about […]

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My Garbage Man, My Enemy

February 4, 2012

27 Comments

This is Clancy. Clancy is our beagle.  He’s just about the sweetest, kindest-hearted animal you can imagine.  He doesn’t even bay – the only time he howls is when he hears a fire engine or wild dogs.  The things that matter to Clancy are chewies, chasing his Squeaky Monkey, making sure that no one is […]

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Typos Offend the God Rofeeb.

December 29, 2011

18 Comments

So, there’s just no cool way to put this, but I really like editing.  I just do.  Taking something that’s a train-wreck of confusion or waste or sloppiness and creating something beautiful.  Harmony from chaos.  As loyal, devoted, almost fanatical readers may recall, I’ve been working on a commercial lately, and we shot last week, […]

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Who Are You, And Why Are You Recording The Hallmark Channel?

December 13, 2011

37 Comments

My wife is one of the most intelligent people I’ve ever met.  Truly.  She reads Russian novels for fun.  She goes to the opera and gets it.  Which is not to suggest that I’m married to Lady Snootybottom of Floggingpeasant Estate or anything, she’s fun and goofy and everything.  It’s just that her intellect is […]

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Crime-Buster Action Update!

December 3, 2011

19 Comments

As readers may recall, a couple weeks ago my wife and I became America’s greatest heroes.  The fact that Christopher Nolan and Bryan Singer aren’t fist-fighting over the movie rights to our story can only be explained by the notion that they’re playing coy (Well, it won’t work, Nolan!).  So, there have been a few […]

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This Thing’s Going To Be On The Edge Of Edgy – Maybe On The Edge of THAT!

December 1, 2011

16 Comments

I’m currently getting ready to direct a commercial; right now it ‘s in the planning stages.  It’s a low budget ad, just for the Internet.  It’s for this thing that you can use in restaurants where you swipe your card at the table instead of the waiter taking the card and running away and buying […]

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You Can’t Spell “Vacation” Without “Relax.” Well, Obviously, You Can, But You Get My Meaning.

November 29, 2011

28 Comments

We’ve spent the better part of the last week in the San Juan islands, up in northern Washington, staying in a cabin looking out over the ocean.  It was not terrible.  I am more relaxed than before. A few key moments: There’s a woodstove and I love getting fires going in it.  I love it […]

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A Very Byronic Anniversary

November 22, 2011

27 Comments

Today marks one year of The Byronic Man being online.  Hurray for me!  One year of not shooting myself in the foot, and not abandoning it.  Phew.  I did a few posts before launching it initially, so that when the legions of people flocked to it immediately upon creation there’d be several posts for them […]

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Please Hire Me To Be An Astronaut

November 18, 2011

28 Comments

Did you know Saturn isn't spherical, but actually ovoid?  No?  Hm.  I'll send you a postcard from space.

Dear NASA, I read this morning that you are currently taking applications to be an astronaut.  I was under the impression you were making a lot of cutbacks so I’m not sure how this is possible, but I stopped reading after the “Now Hiring” part because I wanted to get my resume in right away. […]

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The Adventures of Stoic Man and Impulse Girl

November 11, 2011

31 Comments

"When we get to the border just play it cool, because we don't have passports."

Hey, everyone, how are things?  How’s your week?  Anything interesting happen?  Uh-huh.  Uh-huh.  Uh-huh.  Wow, that’s great but Oh my god listen to what happened to me! So, my mother-in-law has gone out of town for a few days, and we’ve been taking care of her house – feeding the pets, picking up mail, feeding […]

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