Caption Contest: Bad Dream Senior Pictures Edition

January 13, 2013

Humor

It’s caption contest day!  Hurray! You all know how this works: ponder the odd majesty of the image below and leave your best caption; next week I’ll present the finalists for voting.

Some images are just weird.  Some you can tell were caught at just the wrong moment.  Then there are the ones that you really, really wish you knew the story behind – this… this is probably the opposite of that.

I will start things rolling: “What?  My ad said ‘Nude Photography.’  I am a photographer.  I am nude.  Stop acting so confused.”

caption_contest-forest-photo

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Recently voted "The Best Humor Blog in America That I, Personally, Write," The Byronic Man is sometimes fiction, sometimes autobiography. And sometimes cultural criticism. Oh, and occasionally reviews. Okay, it's all those different things, but always humorous. Except on the occasions that it's not. Ah, geez. Look, it's a lot of things, okay? You might like it, is the point.

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85 Comments on “Caption Contest: Bad Dream Senior Pictures Edition”

  1. josefkul Says:

    Here at Bare Ass Photography we bring entirely new meaning to the words ‘flash photography’!

    Reply

  2. Rutabaga the Mercenary Researcher Says:

    Um… I’m trying to eat my breakfast :)

    Reply

  3. W Says:

    When Alfred told Charlotte that he was a point and shoot photographer, she just prayed he meant his camera.

    Reply

  4. on thehomefrontandbeyond Says:

    I threw up a little in my mouth

    Reply

  5. Hippie Cahier Says:

    Weekly Photo Challenge: Wrong. So Very-Nightmarishly-Indescribably-Wrong-That-There-Are-No-Adverbs-To-Capture-It-Wrong.

    I vote for your caption, though.

    Reply

  6. hiddinsight Says:

    “Now for this shot I want you to picture me naked…”

    Reply

  7. Maria Says:

    Wow! I can’t stop looking. I leave the site, I walk away and yet I return, repeatedly. *laugh*

    Reply

  8. TAE Says:

    This picture leaves my mind utterly blank…and I wonder if that’s maybe a good thing.

    Reply

  9. Every Record Tells A Story Says:

    People often wondered why there were very few photos of Ansell Adams…

    Reply

  10. Every Record Tells A Story Says:

    “Jack, when I said I wanted you to increase the exposure, this wasn’t exactly what I had in mind…”

    Reply

  11. angeliquejamail Says:

    “Fine, fine, you’re right. Your poses are much more interesting. Geez. Last time I play strip photography with you!”

    Reply

  12. karensamenow Says:

    “It’s a known fact, my camera takes better pictures when I’m unencumbered M’Lady!”

    Reply

  13. Angie Z. Says:

    In a new approach to her research, best known for inspiring the movie “Gorillas in the Mist,” scientist Dian Fossey trades places with her subject for the day.

    Reply

  14. mistyslaws Says:

    Adopting the wisdom of toddlers by closing her eyes to assume invisibility, Sally just kept chanting, “be the tree, BE THE TREE.”

    Reply

  15. TAE Says:

    Ok, so this took me a long while. Therefore it’s especially thoughtful:

    “Yeah, yeah! Hug it! Tighter! I said, HUG IT!”

    Reply

  16. List of X Says:

    “Yes, yes, finally, there’s that sad and disgusted look I was asking for!!!”

    Reply

  17. Life With The Top Down Says:

    Hugo finally reveals the flash method used to land Monica the cover of Shock & Awe Magazine.

    Reply

  18. List of X Says:

    A chance to capture a photo of a rare North American tree-hugger can come when you are least prepared to take it…

    Reply

  19. Elyse Says:

    Some folks just need jewels in their navels to liven things up.

    Reply

  20. Richard L Wiseman Says:

    Welcome To Cornwall!

    Reply

  21. Kim Says:

    “OK… right there! Perfect! Stare forlornly, deep into my belly button. Great!”

    Reply

  22. YeahWhatSheSaid Says:

    “Hey, hey! Camera’s up here, sweetheart.”

    Reply

  23. k8edid Says:

    I have as much chance making it as a professional photographer as you do graduating in May, sweetheart…

    OR

    When Mom said I could get a class ring if I got the stripped-down senior picture package – she wasn’t kidding…

    Reply

  24. NiinaMaria Says:

    I was told that the photographer was outstanding but that’s little bit too much out and standing.

    Reply

  25. Tez Says:

    “Is that a camera on your face, or are you just pleased to see me?’

    Reply

  26. The Bumble Files Says:

    Yours is hard to top!

    Mine is: I can’t look at you. Will you just put that thing way?

    Reply

  27. Barbara Backer-Gray Says:

    Oh Sexy Stalin, please come rescue me!

    Reply

  28. musingsoftheamusingmuse Says:

    Wow. I am at a loss for words on this one! However, I shared it with the modeling education group I moderate… they’ll appreciate it!

    Reply

  29. L @ Trying Not to be Fat Says:

    It seriously hurts to look at that. I don’t think I’m hungry anymore!

    Reply

  30. renée a. schuls-jacobson Says:

    When Peter whipped out his long black camera lens, The Giving Tree decided she had given quite enough.

    Reply

  31. Jill Pinnella Corso Says:

    “Take five. I left my telephoto lens in my other shorts.”

    Reply

  32. Go Jules Go Says:

    When Sally said she liked wood, Hal knew he’d finally found the perfect subject.

    Reply

  33. MJ Says:

    maybe if i hide behind this tree he won’t see me!

    Reply

  34. winopants Says:

    In order to blend with the natural surroundings, Demitri decided to eschew traditional lighting, relying instead on his ethereally white skin to illuminate his subject

    Reply

  35. thesinglecell Says:

    In order to calm her nerves about being a newly-discovered supermodel, Melanie decided to picture her photographer clothed.

    Reply

  36. thesinglecell Says:

    Submission #2:
    Melanie quickly discovered the danger of walking alone in the Grecian woods. The natives were nothing like she’d imagined.

    Reply

  37. thesinglecell Says:

    Submission #3:
    “Who wears sandals in the woods?” Melanie wondered.

    Reply

  38. thesinglecell Says:

    Submission #4:
    Melanie fretfully pondered what kind of lens Lars had stashed in his shorts.

    Reply

  39. thesinglecell Says:

    Submission #5:
    While the camera focused on her face, she tried not to notice that his chest was furry, but his underarms were strangely smooth.

    Reply

  40. stettlerpro Says:

    Let’s hurry this up, my baby is kicking.

    Reply

  41. freshveggies/gingerleaphoto Says:

    Fruit of the Loom Photography, “The Woodsman”

    Reply

  42. k8edid Says:

    The elusive double-breasted bed-thrasher is filmed for a documentary to appear on Sasquatch-TV.

    Reply

  43. UndercoverL Says:

    ‘Just stare into my eye… let your eyes tell the story.’

    Reply

  44. twindaddy Says:

    “I think the lens is longer. Why am I letting this idiot take my picture?”

    Reply

  45. Brown Road Chronicles Says:

    It didn’t take long for California based “Girls Gone Wild” Photographer Joe Scarbone to realize that his latest project “Girls in the Wild” shot deep in the Oregon woods, would not have nearly the commercial success as his previous project.

    Reply

  46. rossmurray1 Says:

    After much consideration, Marguerite felt the camera feature was the sole redeeming quality of the new Apple iVlad.

    Reply

  47. Sandy Sue Says:

    Goodness, these captions are all stellar. How will we ever vote?

    Reply

  48. Michael Says:

    Mary-Jane didn’t care if her boyfriend was Spider-Man; Peter Parker’s photography career had taken a turn for the creepy.

    Reply

  49. Eireen Says:

    “Please take off those shoes immediately Rob! They make you look disgusting!”

    Reply

  50. Lorna's Voice Says:

    Mine is: “Nothing comes between me and my Calvins… well, maybe this tree and and a can of pepper spray.”

    Reply

  51. 1pointperspective Says:

    Otto was just about to snap a shot of the tree when another beautiful young woman came running into the frame. That Speedo is a magnet for the chicks, man.

    Reply

  52. 1pointperspective Says:

    Ernst wanted to be ready in case he had to raise his arm during the photo shoot, so he had his pits waxed. Sadly, he had under estimated the importance of maintaining the rest of the package.

    Reply

  53. 1pointperspective Says:

    Angus invested some of his earnings from the Southern Comfort commercials in a nice 35mm camera.

    Reply

  54. aaforringer Says:

    If I tell him the camera lense is on this will take even longer.

    Reply

  55. thevelvetpillow Says:

    ” I will display my imperfections, while you hide your insecurities. Come out and let the real you shine lady.”

    Reply

  56. RC Says:

    Im relatively confident that guy has had a Brazilian wax recently. He pays great attention to his lines…

    Reply

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. Raiders Of The Lost Outdoor Gear Catalogue | The Byronic Man - January 14, 2013

    [...] P.S. – Don’t forget to submit your entry for the caption contest! [...]

  2. Should You Vote For The Caption Contest Finalists?? Does A Photographer Strip In The Woods? | The Byronic Man - January 20, 2013

    [...] contest had a lot of great entries. If you haven’t, you really should take a moment to read the entries here.  Narrowing it down to 5 meant finally just flipping a coin, basically.  But flip a coin I did, [...]

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